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Bill Belew has raised 2 bi-cultural kids, now 34 and 30. And he and his wife are now parenting a 3rd, Mia, who is 8.



I don’t know, maybe they are using a machine to do write the subtitles instead of a real person. But then, that might not make any difference.

My wife (Made in China) sometimes enjoy watching Chinese flicks. It gives her a chance to watch something in her native language while I do the reading – IF I can stay awake.

We say a great movie a while back “Together” about a young boy who plays the violin. His ‘uncle’ takes him to the city to see if he can make it big.

READ : Interview With Jack Ma – Alibaba & Taobao (Concl.)

Great story – have a box of tissues handy.

Then I came across a list of a baker’s dozen of Chinese subtitles. I found them quite humorous. I hope you get a kick out of them, too.

Actual Chinese Movie Subtitles

1. Same old rules: no eyes, no groin.

2. Gun wounds again?

3. Fatty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep.

4. A normal person wouldn’t steal pituitaries.

5. The bullets inside are very hot. Why do I feel so cold?

6. Take my advice, or I’ll spank you without pants.

7. Who gave you the nerve to get killed here?

8. I’ll fire aimlessly if you don’t come out!

9. You always use violence. I should’ve ordered glutinous rice chicken.

10. Beat him out of recognizable shape!

11. I got knife scars more than the number of your leg’s hair!

12. Beware! Your bones are going to be disconnected.

13. How can you use my intestines as a gift?

Have you seen any funny translations?

Please send them to me in the comments of this blog and I’ll compile them and repost them later…giving you credit if you leave me your info.


Talk to Bill and others about their experiences raising bi-cultural Japanese-American kids.

Bill Belew

Daddy and Christian.

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