Bill Belew has raised 2 bi-cultural kids, now 34 and 30. And he and his wife are now parenting a 3rd, Mia, who is 8.
Yelling at kids doesn’t work.
It’s kind of like living next to train tracks or under the flight path of an airport. After a while you don’t hear the noise.
When kids are yelled at, it doesn’t work. What results is:
1. they stop hearing you unless you get louder and louder.
2. they get angry.
3. they get sad.
4. they get depressed.
5. they don’t change.
Name calling, cursing, screaming … doesn’t work.
What should mommies and daddies do?
Talk to me before you get so mad that you want to scream. I really don’t want to make you angry.
If you are tired, take turns talking to me. Even I can see that sometimes daddy is more tired than mommy or the other way around.
Tell me why I should do something the right way BEFORE I have ever considered doing it the wrong way.
If I move slow and I am late for school, then I know I will get a tardy slip. AND, I won’t have time to watch an episode of Strawberry Shortcake or Littlest Pet Shop or …
Just remind me of why I should do something, don’t yell at me for why I didn’t do something or am doing something that is going to give me a bad result.
Please don’t yell at me. It doesn’t work.