Bill Belew has raised 2 bi-cultural kids, now 34 and 30. And he and his wife are now parenting a 3rd, Mia, who is 8.
Having one dad is difficult to manage imagine the anxiety that the families go through when they end up with two dads. Managing two relationships is of course a challenge to the spouse and the kids who have to adjust to the new person and confront the bitter truth about their family. The kids in these families have a lot of questions and demand satisfactory answers in search of their father figure.
Dads have to go out of their ways to provide comfort and the level of satisfaction as he deals with several unexpected answers. They have to deal with the other dad who might not be genetically their dad but in some case might the right dad that they are looking for. The children look to bond with these dads and see which one of them is really able to understand their inner feelings in order to hit that common ground.
There is also some degree of competition for attention among these dads especially with kids as they want to be able to look good and providing to the kids so that they show respect for them in front of the spouse. The spouse is usually confused by the situation and looks for ways to meet financial obligations because that is her bottom line in any marriage.
Talk to Bill and others about their experiences raising bi-cultural Japanese-American kids.